This is a difficult post to write because I know that several friends, some close and some far away, will think that I'm writing specifically about them. That's not the case. They are all fantastic and I wish them only love and happiness.
It seems that in the last couple of months, many friends have announced they are expecting their second (or third or fourth) child. This is amazing news for them.
However, it's hard to hear that news. It reminds me that we haven't yet been blessed with our next child. We almost were, but then it was gone.
This feeling sucks. I feel guilty for being bitter that we haven't gotten pregnant again. I feel guilty for being angry with life that it 'seems' to come so easily for others. I know that it likely isn't the case - I may just not be privy to their struggles. I feel guilty for resenting their happiness.
It is not any one individual. It's just a collective baby boom that seems to be happening around us that we wish we were participating in.
So with each heartfelt congratulations goes a twinge of pain and guilt. I only hope that we can soon share our own news and that pain and guilt go away.
Tuesday, August 21, 2012
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